Ever found yourself or someone you know giving explanations beyond the ordinary even when not asked for? Well, this is a common behavior known as overexplaining. Overexplaining is a trauma response that can manifest in various ways, such as constantly repeating oneself, providing excessive details in a conversation, or feeling compelled to justify one's actions or thoughts.
This behavior is often triggered by a traumatic event or a traumatic past that has left an individual feeling insecure or doubtful about their own experiences. In these situations, overexplaining can serve as a way to cope with feelings of vulnerability and insecurity by seeking validation and reassurance from others.
However, overexplaining can also be detrimental to one's relationships and communication with others. It can make conversations feel one-sided, cause others to feel frustrated or resentful, and ultimately lead to disconnection and isolation.
So, what can you do to overcome this trauma response? The first step is to understand that overexplaining is a symptom of underlying trauma and is not a reflection of your inherent worth as a person. It is important to address the root cause of the trauma and work through it in a healthy and supportive manner.
One way to do this is through therapy or counseling. A therapist can help you to identify the triggers that cause you to overexplain and provide you with coping mechanisms and strategies to manage these triggers in a healthy way. Additionally, practicing mindfulness and self-reflection can also be helpful. Take a moment to pause and reflect on why you feel the need to overexplain in a particular situation.
Another helpful step is to set boundaries in conversations and find ways to validate and reassure yourself. It can also be helpful to practice active listening and empathy when communicating with others. Remember to be kind and gentle with yourself as you work through this process, change takes time.